Below is some food for thought about one possible scenario.  Thank you to all of the amazing educators out there who recognize the complex and holistically positive nature of the wonderful children that we serve.  Your work is as important and impactful as any.  Your patience and ongoing commitment to finding pathways to learning and growth for every child is truly amazing.  I am so thankful to be able to spend my days with you!

I got sent to the office yesterday.  I told the teacher I didn’t do it, but I did.  I told her I didn’t do it because I was mad.  Actually, I did it because I was mad.  I was having a lot of trouble getting un-mad too.  I did it because I was frustrated and I wanted her to know.  I made a really mean face after I did it.  When she came to my desk I slid really far down in my chair, crossed my arms, and looked around the room with a smile on my face.  I put a smile on like I was proud and like I thought it was funny, but I wasn’t proud and I didn’t think it was funny.  Some kids laughed, the girl who does everything right and gets good grades on everything rolled her eyes.  I didn’t care.

Actually, I did care.  I still do.  I actually care a lot and I wish I didn’t do it.  I was just mad.  I did want my teacher to know that I was mad, but after she stopped the lesson and everyone was looking at me I started to feel a little bit bad for being so mad and for doing what I was doing.  Actually, I felt a lot bad, and even thought I couldn’t stop I wished that I could.  I sill feel bad.

I really do like my teacher.  She does this fun thing where we can’t come in the room in the morning without greeting her in a special way.  She has a chart that shows different ways that people greet each other around the world.  I like the one where we put our hands together and bow our heads a little, and then we smile at each other.  She also reads books with really good silly voices.  I like that too.  She does a lot of good things.  I’m just really bad at multiplying and I almost got it yesterday, but she kept going before I had a chance.  I wanted to finish.  All of the sudden I was so mad.  That’s when I did it.

I threw my pencil at the Smart Board.  I threw it far enough away that it wouldn’t hit anyone.  I was just mad.  I wanted her to know I was mad.  It turned out to be a really big deal because a pencil is sharp and I guess it could have hurt someone.  We stopped doing math all together.  That’s when she came to my desk.  That’s when everyone started looking at me.  That’s when I smiled like I was proud and like I thought it was funny.  That’s when the girl who does everything right and get’s good grades rolled her eyes.  That’s when I actually felt bad.  And that’s when I hoped my teacher knew I wasn’t a bad person.  She must think that I am one though.  I would.  I’m pretty sure they all do.  Who cares anyway?

I couldn’t stop making a mean face.  I was nervous and embarrassed, and I just couldn’t stop.  She told me to stop.  She gave me a first warning, and then a second warning, and then she told me that I had “One last chance.”  I told her that I didn’t care, but actually I did.  I told her that I didn’t care with a really mean face.  She sent me to the principal’s office.  I gave Joey a high five on my way out.  I wish I didn’t do that, but I did.  I heard my teacher saying, “Joey!” in a mad voice as I walked out.  I heard Joey said, “Sorry,” and everything was ok.  That’s what other kids do.  I wish I could do that too.  I am a nice person, but I just can’t do things like that.  I wish I could.

Today, I didn’t want to look at my teacher when I came into class.  I put a really mean look on my face again.  I wish that I hadn’t.  My teacher tapped me on the shoulder before I made it through the door.  I stopped, but I kept the mean look on my face.  She put her hands together, bowed her head a little, smiled, and said, “good morning.”  I wanted to do it back but I couldn’t.  I walked to my seat without looking her.  When I sat down I was kind of surprised to realize that I didn’t feel a mean look on my face anymore.

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